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Bunched Up Underthings
Dear
Dottie,
Summer
is the time for weddings and parades. How do you determine what
to wear for either? It just seems like I’m always sitting
on the curb of Main Street watching the high school bands and
exposing my crinolin for all the young boys to see. And then,
when I go to the weddings, I find myself in foofy dresses that
aren’t appropriate when they play the Animal House
soundtrack.
Oh,
help me, Dottie. You’re my only hope.
Signed,
Bunched up in underthings
Dearest
Bunched-Up:
 First
of all, Dear Dottie is only familiar with the kind of Animal
House where we boarder our babies when we go on vacation,
Peter’s Blue Cross Clinic over on Crestview and 36th—oh,
and they take pets too. At any rate, as far as your garment troubles,
Dottie suggests new WunderWeave® All-Occasion
crinolines. Dottie wears them ALL the TIME, and they can easily
be inflated to suit the purpose at hand, be it a parade, a PTA
meeting, or even an Intimate Moment (in separate beds, naturally!).
I have included a shot of myself tending a Summer Frankfurter
Fest in a Lime WunderWeave® (they match most garments, I find).
They breathe oh-so-nicely, and the one I am wearing is only at
Moderate Inflation!
Or,
to play it really cool (and a little risqué!), try an ensemble
consisting of a pantyliner and a pair of aspirin. THAT will getcha
noticed!
Kisses,
-Dottie
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